Be honest with yourself; admit that you didn’t do enough.

On consistency and taking responsibility for your (in)actions.

Yesterday, I wrote on being kind and extending grace to yourself (here). However, I think it’s also important to tell yourself where you messed up and not console yourself with “at least, I’m still alive”. There has to be a balance.

Just before we talk about you, let me report myself. On my birthday in February, I told myself I would go back to playing the guitar and upload song covers on YouTube. I remembered every few weeks, and I’d say to myself that I still had time. Anyway, I neither played the guitar nor uploaded song covers. Quite honestly, I can’t remember exactly where the guitar is. If I still remember how to play do re mi fa so la ti do, it’ll be because God just pitied me or something. I was lazy and didn’t do enough. Actually, in this case, I didn’t even do anything.

On that same birthday, I told myself I would spend the rest of the year preparing for a professional exam while also learning Machine Learning. I kept postponing it and blaming it on school and work. It’s a lie, though. I’m badass at multitasking and could have juggled them, but I chose the easy way out. See, procrastination is a bastard. At first, it was, “You have the whole of ten months.” Later, I started telling myself that I had six months. Shout out to T.A., by the way. He stayed on my neck at some point in September and told me I was lazy. It stung a bit, but I knew he was right, so I started preparing for both (September o, since February, smh). Now, it’s Layo who’s my accountability partner, and I’m consistent with my plans and tasks. Thankfully, I jazzed up.

So you, my dear, wrote on your wall that you wanted to get a job at FAANG at the end of the year, but you didn’t do anything or didn’t do enough. The Udemy Front-end Development course that you bought in January when you tweeted, “Time to get serious” is still there, and you’ve only gone about 20% through it. All the while, you kept telling yourself, “Wo, let me rest. Na who dey alive dey write code.” And when you saw Mr Daniel tweet that he increased his earnings x23, you were shouting, “God, when?” God, when what, Tomi? When what? I want to imagine that God is looking at you with raised eyebrows and wondering why you’re shouting. Imagine asking God to crown your efforts with success when, in fact, the only effort you put in was wishing.

On the flip side, I pursued my writing, editing, and school goals with all my strength. I’m still pursuing them. And I have tangible stuff to show for it. So it’s more than just writing the goals or tweeting about what you want to do. What are you doing? Are you putting in the work to hit those goals you set, or you’re hoping the universe can read your mind and a recruiter will offer you a job when you’re grossly unqualified? It’s never about how badly you want something or wish you were Elon Musk; it’s about how hard you’re willing to work and go the extra mile. Don’t get so comfortable with mediocrity or cooking up excuses and expect to ‘blow’.

Like we discussed yesterday, it’s not time to wallow in regret; it’s time to get serious. Today’s November 15th, the time to start is now. I jazzed up in aspects I was slacking in September; if you haven’t, start NOW. Set realistic goals and be intentional about creating a system that ensures you get them. And I know this might sound contradictory, but be kind to yourself still.

I promised to write to you soon, and I did. Don’t be lazy, okay? And stop acting like the universe is against you when what happened is that you simply didn’t put in the work.

I should write to you soon. I’m rooting for you.❤️❤

Disclaimer: All the people referred to in this piece asides Mr. Daniel are fictional. Any resemblance to anyone dead or alive asides Mr. Daniel who is alive is purely coincidental. In simple terms, If your name is Tomi, no vex abeg.